126th

Dad called me this morning at 8. he asked me to go and check for Immigration Officer vacancy and interview to see if i got any. so i did checked once i got home from college.  then, Dad called me again just now, and asked if i did checked. and he told me that my cuzz got a sms saying that she got i think it's a call for interview. sighhh..
i seriously don't know what to do now. well, yeah, except that assignment that i need to submit tomorrow. Sher, YOU LUCKY ASS. I envy you. ugh.. 
MY LIFE ENDS NOW. :"( pathetic me -.-"

124th

just got back from picking sweet potatoes somewhere near here. haha. seriously, i'm bluffing.


okay, on the way home from robbing the bank this evening, i almost peed myself. gosh, i never felt so much retard like this before. uh ya, including the trip to Bako last semester, i pooped i think 6 times that day. serious shit. i almost canceled the trip, but with all strengths i tried to put up i finally made it to the toilet without shitting on my pants. thank GOD i can go jungle trekking without any stomachache. PHEW! my guard. i was really terrified if i peed myself while on the bus. if i did, that will be that day i would never ever forget, i probably wouldn't ride on that bus again! i seriously never feel so much stupider. 


oh dayemmmm.. i just remember that i got an ASSignment that is due this Saturday. and i haven't had my ass working on it. just great,i'm screwed. EPIC FAIL. 
FACEBOOK YOU STAY AWAY FROM MEEEEE!!

oh flu.

i googled for symptoms of flu. and i opened the Oxford dictionary to find out what does flu and fever translates. yeah, i can't make out the difference between flu and fever. geez! 
and yeah, i know now. and  i hope i'll remember this always. -__-
i got flu. been sneezing like hell. and the mucus from the nose, you just never fail me to come out from my nose every time after i had my shower. thanks i feel so much retard now.
google, you're very teasy eh? i typed flu symptoms and you come out with swine flu in Bahasa Melayu. babi lu. you're so pig. *snort*
Test 3 will be held the week after next week. which is the first week of November.
and no more test except for final exam. note that, FINAL. on December. 
my goodness, i haven't working on my assignment yet! screwed!
dayemm! just checked out the calendar, my Titas assignment is due next week! and my Professional Ethics is i don't remember when! luckily it's a group assignment.
i'm soo SCREWED. like always.
omg, can't believe Paramore's rocking out at KL tonight and at this very hour. 
and a very happy birthday to my beloved besties. Vava Pb Bulan. *go search for her Facebook!
i hope her to get married before me, so i can laugh at her face and show her that i'm enjoying my single life. geez. so mean.
gah! mucus! can't you just disappear?! i just finished a box full of tissue just to wipe you! *snort

101th post

geez? my 101th post? 
i thought of cutting my hair short. like real short. 
wonder if short hair looks okay with me.
seriously i got depressed with my hair. ugh. i wanted to keep it long. but.
should i keep it long and curl it this Christmas or just cut it short so i won't bother to do anything with it?
i think i maybe look cute if i cut it short like this. *grin

omg this internet line is fucking slow. it took forever to download even just a song. pfft.
and guess what, i gonna have to pay extra for this shit since my usage exceeded 5gb this month.
awesome. i really need to grow money from a tree.

if it hurts

i'm completely lost. i'm all about that peer issues. seriously.
i don't know la. or maybe it was just me.
i'm very silent these few days. i don't talk a lot, especially to this one friend. *sigh
she were speaking as if i'm invisible, and that she can see right through me.
i even start to wonder if i'm alive. last time, they were planning on an outing. they just planned on without hearing from me. 
but i know i won't be left alone, and i know how awkward it would be if i go out with them.
and thanks to my other friend who's staying at the hostel, at least i got company.
and the day were just me and her. we went to other place without THEM.
i actually almost gave up, you see, as in my previous post, i'm not happy. 
for now, i can't seem to turn to my so-called friends room mates. 
can i blame them? or should i blame myself?
to be true, i'm not angry, not pissed, or hurt at all. i just don't understand them.
seriously i'm worried. 
i don't know why and what is the point of being worried.
i'm too a bit frustrated being treated like this. imagine, we have the same class and i waited at the college, sit all by myself with headphones stuck on my ears looking at people like an idiot for two hours for class to start as well waiting for them to come but they didn't. and what makes it even worse is that i know it from a friend and i weren't inform of their absence by themselves.  great. just great.
what's the point of keeping my number then if they didn't even bother to text me and tell me anything about it?
yeah, i'm frustrated. but no, i'm not pissed, just frustrated.
thanks, for the hint-like. i got it. my previous post is linked to this post. it's related.
that's why i googled for uni's and colleges and jobs last night.
gosh, i don't know how long can i put up with this.
i need signs. i need someone who can inspire me, someone who has the aura of uplifting my spirit. i need someone who can speak to me and tell me something good.
lately, i've spent a lot of my time alone and thinking to myself.
*sighh..lotsa thoughts running..

i sighed a lot

sigh..
geez. do i need to sigh first?
i'm having a lot of issues lately.. student's life..
gah.. oh ya, i've wanted to post something since last night, but blogger isn't being nice with me last night, idk why. it really pissed me off.
anyway last night too, i googled for my future. geez.
i looked through somebody's pic, suddenly i got interested with Civil Aviation.
and i tried googling for related courses in aviation.
and i found UniKL. and i found courses like Diploma in Aircraft Maintenance Technology,
Diploma of Engineering Technology in Aeroplane Maintenance.
but the requirements failed me. sigh..and geez, Aviation?? woot! so so so not me.
and suddenly, i remembered of my cousin in Unisel. so i googled Unisel, and look through its courses, and of all courses, i got interested with Diploma in TESL. okay this one fits me. well, since i favorited  English language (though i must admit that i'm not super good with my English yet) and the requirement fits me. 
but then, lots of thoughts came running my mind. sigh..
if i applied there and got accepted, then i have to start all over again as junior. damn, i'm not getting any younger and i have to start again? my other friends now are either already hold a diploma in their hands or taking degree now, and on the other hand, i just started my first semester taking diploma at the age of . . . grrr.. ohhh. geez.. where have i been all this time? what have i been doing?? sigh..
then, i thought of my dad. i really pity my dad. even though he worked in the government sectors doesn't mean we can live well now without all the money problems, i really don't want to burden him with my problems. you know, flight cost, study loan agreement and lotsa other documents. if we're rich, . . .
sigh.. money again. it's always about the money.
sighhh..
restarting all over again won't be a problem, but the money . . hmmm..
a lot of consequences i have to consider. 
i just not only browsing for studies opportunity, but jobs also in government sectors.
hmmm.. i know i've not been a very pious person. who am i anyway..
i seriously care about my family, my mom, and my dad especially.
i really don't want to add any more money problem to them.
for now, i wish my younger siblings study well, and make sure they don't follow the footsteps of mine, i really hope, right after they got their results, they won't delay their times of continuing their studies. that's my prayer. i hope God would hear me this time.